She's So Pretty

I have been friends with my bestie since we were seven years old. We were both in love with Paul and we fought over him. Oh, Paul! Even though I TOTALLY WON, I have never let another Mister come between me and my sister - it's just the way it's been ever since. I guess it helps that we have completely different tastes in men as well. She preferred the poorly, straggly ill-looking guys that were meant to grow into even more straggly rock stars, or so it seemed. Whatever floated her boat; it was all good - except when she was dating a guy that looked like a heroin-addicted version of Jesus. That was too much, sorry!

My friend is beautiful, even as a young girl. To counter-balance her beauty, she is, however, less versed in the ways of logic and street smarts. Whenever she would say something that was less than stellar in the intellect department, we would say, "Ah well, she's so pretty!" My own mother was one of the most guilty parties of doing this to her.

Anyway, she came with me the second time I moved to Australia. For the most part, we got along no problem... until we started travelling around the country together.

After 3 long, long weeks of making sure she had all her belongings (to which the answer was usually NO) and insuring she didn't loose her passport, wallet, money, clothes, mind, etc, etc... I was fucking exhausted. I never needed a vacation from my vacation so desperately as I did that month.

We were on the home stretch approaching Sydney when the coach had pulled into a rest area for a very brief stop. There was time to line up for the toilet or line up for food, but not both. Dammit! I wanted both. I ordered my food and had my friend wait in my place while I went to the bathroom. I was given a number - 68; it was underlined so one knew how to read it, like a shoe size, right? Got it? Good.

I had exited the kitchen area when I heard "SIXTY EIGHT". I quickly glanced through the mesh door to see if she was making a motion to claim my order. Nothing.

"SIXTY EIGHT?"

Still nothing.

Oh my god, I had to fucking pee so badly! I ran back in and YELLED at my friend,  "What the fuck?" She was starring off into oblivion thinking of lord only knows. I snatched the ticket from her hand; I was furious... and almost wetting my shorts to top it off. I quickly grabbed my food and turned around to give my friend the death stare.

"What? I was listening, I swear! I never heard her call out Eighty-Nine. Gawwd!"

She's soooo pretty!