Apr 10, 2011

Don't Drown in the Shallow End

The one huge fall back from online dating is the whole notion of meeting someone AFTER you've already made some kind of emotional connection. The odds of them living up to all that you have orchestrated in your imagination is slim to none. At least with blind dates, you'd have no preconceived ideas upon what to expect.

One of my potential suitors was an absolute fire cracker online. His personality really shone through on Messenger and he was awesome at distracting me from work with hilarious stories and dirty jokes. I didn't mind; I hated that job anyway.

I had at least 10 photos of myself on my online profile, from all angles and all stages of intoxication. TEN. I wasn't hiding anything. I never understood why one would even want to falsely advertise themselves. Dumb.

The time had come for Mister Cool Guy to pick me up for our first "date". OK, so he was a bit of a red neck and he picked me up in his equally red pick-up truck AND was taking me to a motor-cross event, but at least he was a slightly educated red neck with a good job... and he smelled great.

Actually, he was pretty damn hot...
except for the look of disappointment on his face when I opened the door. It was pretty obvious; I tried to pretend I didn't see, but I did.

What I SHOULD have done was scrape up my self esteem off the front porch and tell him a swift "AdiĆ³s" but I didn't. Did he not closely inspect my vast array of photos to which the end result would be avoiding this very situation?

The entire way to the event, we were just like we were online - our banter back and forth was so fantastic! We were both having a great time, or so I thought. Once we got to the event, he pretty much dropped me like a fucking bad habit and took off with his buddies.

The part that pissed me off the most was that we obviously had great chemistry. I'm not saying he could have been "the one" because he surely wasn't THAT great, but at the least we could have had some really good times together and most likely some wicked sex. He had one of those nicely tanned muscular torsos that I just wanted to run my fingernails up and down. It's too bad he was so horribly disgusted with my ghastly physical appearance (that's heavy sarcasm by the way; I think I'm awesome) that his shallowness caused him to miss out on getting to know a really cool girl – me!

...aaaand I never heard from that guy again.


  1. the world can be amazingly shallow. i'm glad i haven't had to take a dip in the online dating pool. it had only just begun when i met my husband.
    i never understood the fake pictures either. i mean, if your goal is to make real dates in the real world, you're not doing yourself any favors by putting up someone who looks better than the real you since they'll clearly be disappointed by what they see in real life.

  2. I met my ex online. and an ex before that....and before that.......I had a couple one night stands from online...hahaha!

    I was so stupid...and desperate. I wanted out of my small town and was probably willing to do almost anything to get out.

    I met a bunch of crappy guys, and shy guys, and bad kissers and sweaty palm guys...

    Then I met my Mr. C. ....he was my 1st long term relationship. long distance, too. 1 hr apart. met him online. 6 months of love, 6 more months of fights. and other things that could have gotten worse before I ended it....

    it ended with me feeling like a 2bit hooker... who met up with her boyfriend at a pay by the hour motel BECAUSE he didn't want to spend the whole weekend with me. he wanted to hang with his buddies. he needed his space. apparently he just wanted to get laid without the responsibility of having a girlfriend.

    flirting with the waitress during our dinner, then taking me to a motel. classy.

    God, i was young and stupid! I guess I thought I loved him. We were together almost a year -- then all of a sudden I feel like some piece of trash. How does a man I said, "I love you" to do that to me?? One of the best days of my life was when I told him off...took me over 2 years to get him to leave. He turned into a stalker. WTF is up with that??

    The Man wrote his LIFE story in a 30 page manefesto!! Emailed it to me!!! 2 years after I broke up with him - and he writes that he broke up with me??? First, who writes a manefesto?? 2nd, who emails it to their EX 2 years later????????

    I got an email again from him last year. His sister had a baby. Uh...ok.

    OHHHHHHHHHHHH, get this!!! he called me about a yr after I broke up with him saying he lost weight - and was turning his life into more focus or something..... saying that since he lost weight, "other things have gotten bigger" ....BAHAHA!! I am NOT making this up Lady!!

    ok, so I met Mike during that stalking period with my ex....it was during my "no kissing on the 1st date, no sex for 3 months rule" ....we made it a month before I dropped HIS pants in my parents Garage, hidden by the cover of darkness...hahaha....it was hot, -- and a whole lotta other things I should probably just write about in my romance novel. should turn it to erotica. LOL

    and I met him ONLINE! hahaha!! 5 minutes after he emailed me his phone number, my computer was hit with a surge of lightning!!!! sign from above???

    ....if it's meant to be, it'll happen. I almost tried those speed dating things....that woulda been fun.

    I'd love to see a poll with how many people met their significant others online...

    OH, been with Mike for 5 years now. Have a beautiful little boy! Had to kiss a few toads to land my prince. Guess I just used the internet to find my boyfriends.... where some people don't. I heard its super common nowadays.

    *** side note: you bring this confession out of me!! What is it about you???? I'd probably never write this on my own blog - my Aunts and cousins read it, LOL!!!

    Love ya lady for giving me a place to tell my dirty deeds!

    p.s. I just re read what I wrote -- wow, DRAMA right??? I'm rolling...it's funny. oh, sweet memories...LOL

  3. Pffft...what a douche. I totally, totally felt you when you noticed that look in his eye upon meeting you. That happened to me once. I kinda wanted to send him a message and say; "yeah, I don't date guys that only come up to my tits, so it's all good, eh Girlboy?"

  4. Middle finger sit and spin on that! Dating sucks and I'm glad I don't have to do it. But then there's the excitement of meeting someone new and really clicking with them, and that's over for me, at least sexually lol.

    I have an award for you if you want to stop by and pick it up - happy weekend!

  5. I've met some of those online douches too. Had great online chemistry, sent photos of me and then seen that look of disappointment. I mean, HELLO you saw a real picture of me and knew what I looked like - we had great online chemistry but them give me that look? Most of them weren't much of a prize themselves, but damn I was willing to give them a shot at least. They wrote me off just at a first glance, and I'm sorry - I am awesome!
    Sucks not even being given a chance, but you know what...their damned loss! :)

  6. What a total twat.

    Some people are just SO shallow. Well, his loss.

    Thankfully online dating was responsible for my gorgeous husband and my marriage - just a shame twats like this ruin it sometimes.


  7. You should have given him the finger! But let's face it, there are so many shallow men in the world. I think it's fair to blame them for most women's low self-esteem. We should give them a dose of their own medicine.

    My husband and I are proof that online dating works, but I did have my share of disappointments before meeting him. I met some assholes, and when I had all but given up, I met the man who is now my husband. He has his shallow moments (I do, too), but he's one of the good ones.


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