At the start of the year, I was feeling pretty good. I broke a VERY long dry spell in the climax desert, I got freakin' published, and I dedicated an entire month to my love of music that was fairly successful,
As the year went on, it became very clear that I was missing some of this in my life...
And a whole fucking lot of this -
As I've mentioned this year, even though I'd been shown the gift of ultimate self gratification this year, it still doesn't take the place of affection, attention, and a warm, loving body... or anyone with a pulse, really.
Oh, yeah! I also did this on both trips to the U.S. this year, and now I really, REALLY fucking miss this as well.
And because I miss smoking so gawd damn much, I've begun eating more. Copious amounts of food that would rival most 16 year old boys, actually. So, when I wrote about me quitting dieting and being OK with my body, I take it all back.
Sorry. I suck.
And my underwear looks like this now...
Struggling with this situation doesn't help matters much either, I'm sure. Hummm...
So, these days, I've been feeling more like this.
And all I want to do is this.
Oh, wait. Thanks, Bridget... I almost forgot the fucking ice cream.
That's more like it! Yes!
So I will be heading to see someone in January, hopefully to help me make sense of all my chaos.
And if that doesn't work, prescribe me something so I can feel like this:
(although preferably NOT actually a hallucinogenic - unfortunately, this lady has gotta work, yo!)
So, cheers! Here's to hoping that 2012 brings some good shit.
Or at the very least, I can purchase it from a licensed pharmacist.
Happy New Year!