How Now, Fake Chow?

I decided to watch one of those movies where you see the preview and think, "Meh. One day, I'll watch it when it comes to TV." Well, for Hall Pass, now is that day. Over all, it was a fairly mediocre movie. If I said it was horrible, I would be lumping it in with other horrible movies such as Twilight or Spiderman 3, so I cannot in good faith say it was "horrible". I like mediocre; I'll stick with that description.

It is a Farrelly Brothers movie, so the humor is right up my alley, but only in isolated skits, rather than the movie in its entirety. I'm not going to do a full run down of the movie, but rather one bit that seriously perplexed me: Fake Chow.

Unless the woman is stoned, drunk or has otherwise been numbed from the brain down, who the fuck actually thinks that women cannot tell the difference between a tongue and a finger? Like, whhhhoa. I know it's just a movie, but... Damn right that she never let you forget it for three years! Idiot.

I further investigated this bullshit - straight to the source.

Oh, Tray dog...

Fingers with nails feel a hell of a lot different than a soft, moist tongue. I'm not saying that the finger isn't good - with the right talent driving those fingers, magic can truly happen. Why must one even "pretend"? If you're not in the mood to go down on a woman, just commit to giving her a great finger show. It's all good... BUT... it is like apples to oranges.

And I love apples.
And barely tolerate oranges.
They make my fingers smell.
Long story.
Short story? I'm weird.
Ahem.

A-N-Y-W-A-Y-S, please don't insult our intelligence, as women, and think that we won't notice the difference between the two.

Kaaaa-chow.