Five Funny F*ckrz

I have noticed one thing over the last year and a bit while visiting other blogs - once I read them... once we all read them, there are gone the next day, added into the blog pile archive. I find this a little sad, because it's obvious that people put A LOT of effort into theses posts/features. I really wish I had started this earlier, but I guess it's better late than never, right? It's not going to be regular, but I'll start a running tally and whenever I get to 5, I'll post them.

Here are 5 things that I really had a good laugh over; I feel like it's only right to give them an extra pat on their backs for their spectacularly funny shit! Actually, screw the back patting; I'm more of a congratulatory smack on the ass kind-of-girl - so let's go with that. SMACK! Way to go, funny fuckers!

1. bigwords: The Tampon Revolution: Top 7 Ways To Modernise Tampons
It starts off guns blazing even with the disclaimer:
* Warning this post contains the word tampon. It may offend some people who don't use them.
For the record, I vote for Penis-shaped.

2. Comediva: I'm a Girl and I'm Funny, Yo
I want to be them when I grow up. True Story.
"Do my routine - it kills! There's no dispute. Oh, and I got a dog, ya; he's fucking cute!"


I'm a Girl and I'm Funny, Yo from Comediva on Vimeo.

3. Midget Man of Steel: I Google Alphabetically
I really don't know what's funnier - the weird shit that people type into Google OR the smart ass comments from Moog. It would at least have to be a 40/60 split. It's all hilarious! Also? I'm convinced that he does not work while at "work" - even less than me - and that is saying a lot.

4. I'm Gonna' Kill Him: Textual Healing
Some insightful shorthand texting that would be helpful to any good marriage. I know I'm going to have to teach my husband a couple, if not all of these gems. My personal favorites:

HIM: SFC? (Stop for Condoms?)
YOU: NSFIC (Nah, Stop for Ice Cream)

HIM: AYSM? (Are you spending money?)
YOU: LTAWIS (Let’s talk about what I’m saving)

5. Toy With Me: Exactly Like That Scene in Pretty Woman. Only Totally Different
Yes, exactly because it happened to her, and NOT to me. My favorite excerpt:

"I looked a little bit like Helena Bonham Carter
and not in a fun, Bohemian crazy lady way, but in a Bride of Frankenstein on
crystal meth kind of way."

It's hilarious because I've got that visual in my head and it's super sexy, yo! It is a bit odd that she sports that look in a lot of her movies, now that I think about it, but I won't digress.

Have a fantastic weekend, party people!