Aug 24, 2011

Join or No Bacon!

When the fabulous Carri Brown over at Mommy's Little Monster Blake suggested that one of Mama Kat's writing prompts have to do with BACON. Seriously, how could I resist that? How could anyone, really?
I'll just cut right to it then, shall I?
Here are the Top 10 Reasons why bacon is so fucking awesome:

1. It's likely the only substance that is greasier than my face, so, right there, it's a self esteem booster.

2. Not only is there a type called Canadian Bacon, but it's also a movie that stars John Candy and Rip Torn.

3. When it gets hot, the fat just melts right off - IF ONLY IT WAS THAT EASY! This point makes me slightly jealous of bacon.

4. It is a food item I can easily arrange to have exactly 4 pieces of; this appeases my OCD very nicely.

5. Not very many foods can rock both ketchup AND maple syrup. Preferably not at the same time, but condiment cross-contaminant bleeds are known to occur and yet, it's still scrumptious.

6. It's stripey and stripes are so hot right now.

7. One of the best quotes from Dazed and Confused refers to it: Now fry like bacon, you little freshman piggies. FRY!

8. Did you know George Washington insisted the American flag be made to resemble strips of bacon?
TRUE STORY... well, it's on YouTube, so it must be true, right? Dammit! This has created a rare moment when I wished I was American. Apparently, there's a Bacon Party.



9. There is a company billboard I pass frequently for URBA CON (an urban development company) - but the way their logo is,
(to me) it reads U-R-BACON... I love it and it makes me hungry every time I drive by it.

10. Without bacon, scallops are nothing but fishy rubber marshmallows. It is only when the scallop is wrapped in a blanket of bacon goodness that it truly becomes a divine and delectable h'orderve.

Mama's Losin' It

18 comments:

  1. U-R-BACON.that's gotta be on a bumper sticker.

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  2. I wish my fat would melt off too!

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  3. Did you know it's considered a "crossover food" for vegetarians? They smell it and want to eat it, then poof, they're carnivores.

    It makes me love bacon more, vegetarians annoy me.

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  4. #9 - perfect

    What did the grilled cheese sandwich say to the bacon?

    "You complete me."

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  5. Have you ever had bacon with brown sauce?? HP Sauce I mean not that American crap!! mmmmmm! lush.

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  6. @JoJo

    Yes, I have. Hubs loves it on a Bacon Bap, but I'm not a huge fan - I prefer ketchup... more sugar in that. haha.

    @middle child

    Yes. Yes, it does... complete me too.

    @Twinisms

    Vegetarians annoy me too. lol

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  7. You know what's my absolute favorite? Buttermilk pancakes with maple syrup eaten together with pieces of banana and slices of bacon. I know it sounds ew, but it tastes WOW.

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  8. @Sweaty

    Umm.. that's not eww at all. YUM. All of my favorite breakfast items right there.
    The only thing I'd add was a scoop of scrambled eggs for the win!

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  9. U R BACON! Love it. Excellent reasons. Bacon is like heaven in my mouth. Huh, I should have put that as one of the reasons on my post, but instead I freaked out under the pressure of writing why I love bacon. I have issues. Really, I do.

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  10. so much here to comment on! haha. my favorite is your jealousy towards Bacon.

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  11. I don't eat Bacon,, and I will be kind enough to NOT tell you why.. seriously just trust me..

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  12. I love bacon sofa king much. Suggesting that was the best thing I've ever done in my life! hahaha

    And the fat just melts right off... That shit is genius right thurrrr. Now I wish I were a piece of bacon!

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  13. @Carri

    I don't know about the BEST thing, but definitely in your top 5, I'm sure. LOL

    @singedwingangel

    Yes, please don't. I saw a documentary on veal when I was 16 and haven't eaten it since - don't take bacon from me. Thanks! x

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  14. A-Ha!...well you said you were Canadian, but if you hadn't, I would have had you found out at the point where you too put maple syrup on your bacon! Is there any other way to even eat bacon? Gotta go, have a sudden urge to fry up exactly 112 pieces of bacon....four...pfffttt...that's not even an appy!

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  15. Mmm.

    Maple syrup and bacon.

    What else does a person need?

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  16. holy crap i insanely admire BACON!

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