Jul 2, 2012

'Cos I'm, like, hairy?

Over the last couple months, there has been some women (specifically Emer O'Toole & Charlotte Free) that have been making a statement about feminism and what constitutes femininity over, say, infantilisation by ceasing to shave their body hair - legs, pubes and pits. This post is by no means written with angry PMS coursing through my veins. Au contraire. I was actually laughing out loud and shaking my head (that's right, a real LOL-SMH for realzies) when I was reading/watching these women talk about their new found "freedom".

Snorty snort snort.

This issue is so multifaceted. Of course it is - or else it wouldn't be making headlines, but there's only two points that I really want to discuss today, to prevent me from crapping on for an eternity.

ONE: Who would you rather? 
I don't give a fuck whose rose colored glasses you want me to look though, but the world is a shallow, cruel place, especially in Western culture. Them's the facts. Is it right? Of course not, but there it is. And here's poor, "brave" Charlotte Free with her cute little hairy armpits. Awwweeeee...
{Source: Terry Richardson via Have you heard the latest}

Emer O'Toole attempts to be funny with her answer to the question "Don’t men find you physically repulsive and refuse to engage in sexual and/or romantic relations with you?" but goes on to say that ALL the boyfriends she has had have been OK with it.

Of. Course. They. Are.

She's adorable. Christ, even I want to have sex with her!

These women could fucking braid their pits and put beads on the ends and men will still fall at their feet. I think Emer's kind of completely missed the point which is: Whether or not she has hair on her pits, she's still beautiful! I did three takes on her answer, laughing the whole time and picturing her saying it while smacking gum and twirling her hair. Okay, that might have been slightly bitchy, but you get the point.

I'm not saying that I can't take her seriously since she's stunning either, because THAT would be anti-feminist of me. I'm merely stating that a lot of women that look like that (including many of my own girl friends) have no fucking clue when they say things like, "Awe, those guys are soooo nice!" that those guys just so happened to be the same guys that were complete assholes to me... simply because I didn't look like her.

This would be a more accurate portrayal of me the "average" woman going au naturale.

{Source: eBaum's World}

And if she's cool with that? Then rock on, sista! But it's not for everyone. And it's not as "easy" as it is in Terry's little bubble world.

Just by using these two photos alone proves my point that most people are shallow dick smacks - since the one of Charlotte gets put on the cover of a magazine, and the caption of this Leopard-print Lady (that I purposely cropped out) was something like "Will someone please get me a razor and a shot gun?" Awful.

I rest my case.

TWO: You, Me & my silk panties.
I don't even see why this is a "feminist" issue at all. It's a personal grooming choice. Are there societal conventions? Hell yes, but using it to make some sort of equality statement bores me, especially since it's not 1960. Yawn.

Pro-Choice
Equal salaries
Benefits
Child care

These are feminist issues. You want a hairy snatch? Go right ahead. Personally, I detest the feeling of hairy armpits on myself. I don't give a rat's ass if men prefer one look to the other, it's purely a decision I made for myself a long time ago. Forget feminism, it's not even about femininity either, it just feels good.

I had once described my over zealous pubic area as being likened to that of Russell Brand's hair style. And I didn't like it one bit. I will NEVER forget the first time I shaved the bottom half of my glory box (I keep the top growing, so to maintain my womanly essence) and I have to say, it was fucking a-mazing.

I happened to have a nice little pair of silk panties and when I put them on I was like, "WHOA, BABY."

Then I sat on my boyfriend's face and it was like, "HOOOOLY GAWD!"

And apart from my eyes rolling inside my head, I've never looked back.

So, yes, there may come a day when I will join a picket line and hoist a sign in support of woman's rights, but I will never, not ever deny myself of a good shave.

Unless I went on Survivor.

But we all know how that would work out.

Just sayin'


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Note: Error of the model's name fixed thanks to The Tsarista.
Lesson learned: Don't drink and blog... too often.
x

16 comments:

  1. I'm really all set with NOT being equal to men in the "hairy beast" department.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Saw a woman in the swimming pool the other day with a bush like George Bernard Shaw's beard - it was an 'interesting look' but not one I'd choose to emulate - I' stricktly a fuzz free zone but live and let frizz I say.

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  3. So, not only did I miss out the mofo 'm' in I'm but I also can't spell strictly!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm all for empowering women and everything but hair isnt really a turn on for me...

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  5. Oh, goodness I have been living under a rock, I so have missed this latest little "We are women hear Us Roar" thingy. Um, so sorry, I am shaving my pits, waxing my eyebrows and lip,shaving my legs and trimming my other areas, so so sorry. Honestly, shaving? Really? That is gonna help with equality? Yeah, right!

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  6. I experience a tremendous amount of freedom shaving fifty pounds of hair off my body ever day. Yes, EVERY DAY. I'm Italian. We're hairy. I practically have hair growing out my eyeballs. There's nothing freeing about that.

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  7. Maybe it's the idea that women should be different than men? Since more and more men are manscaping (myself included) Terry thinks that there should be at least one hairy gender??

    I dunno, it's the Sneetches all over again for me...

    ReplyDelete
  8. @Sarcasm Goddess

    Every day?! Wow - that's dedication, sista.

    ReplyDelete
  9. If body hair is what feminists think will make us equal to men I think they miss the point. Feminism should be about us being able to have the same choices and opportunities which also means I should be able to be hairy or hair free and I choose to be hair free.

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  10. I find body hair annoying. I don't like it when I have it but I hate shaving it.
    That chick seems to just want attention

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  11. I agree with you completely-- body hair is not a feminist issue. At all.

    Also-- Terry Richardson? Isn't that the name of the creepy photographer who takes demoralizing photos of his female subjects? I looked at the blog link you included and it looks like that blond chick's name is Emer. Just wondering.

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    Replies
    1. Ohhh, maybe. Models names are tricky to find... and I'm on the sauce this weekend. Will amend when I get home :/

      Delete
  12. I think guys and girls can trim their body hair to stay more hygenic.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Shaving, not shaving, that is a personal grooming issue not a feminist issue. With governments revisiting issues like abortion, funding being cut to places like Planned Parenthood, hairy armpits are the least of all the concerns for women. At least, in my opinion.
    Jenn

    ReplyDelete
  14. A Fucking Men. To the hair is NOT a feminist issue. Not to the not drinking and blogging.

    Fuck hairy armpits. Not only it it gross, it reminds me of my hippie mom. NOT sexy.

    ReplyDelete

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