History Repeating... Or Was That My Acid Reflux?

It was dark but I knew I was in a place I didn't recognize. There were clothes ruffled on the floor. New clothes; some with the tags still on. There was a man's chunky navy blue sweater with subtle red stripes underneath some distressed baggy jeans. They were nice... sexy even, if on the right man... but who was this man that they were meant for?

Jim walks into the room, grabs the clothes off the floor and looks up at me. "What do you think?"
"Yes! They're nice."
"I have to go back to the mall and get another few pairs of jeans. You want to come?"

The car ride was non-existent, like we had teleported to the mall. As soon as we walked through the doors, the song History Repeating was playing... loud. It was manic. There were people running around; some laughing, some screaming. Nick Frost was dressed in a security uniform and was chasing a baby elephant down the main corridor; to my disappointment Simon Pegg was nowhere to be seen. The music was getting louder and louder and Shirley Bassey's powerful voice was reverberating off the shop windows; I could see them shaking.



Jim had disappeared for a few minutes and when he returned, he was dressed like what I can only describe as a 1970s Italian pimp. His chest hair was hanging out and inter-woven with a gold chain. It was so off-putting that I gagged a little. He looked at me as if I was a freak for not liking his new outfit. He rolled his eyes, grabbed me by my hand and we left the store.

The baby elephant had come back around again and left a giant mound of shit close to where we were. The smell hit me like an angry bitch slap and I became truly nauseous. The song was still playing and people were still screaming. I began to throw up, but it wasn't vomit... it was popcorn. Hundreds of popped kernels flowed from my mouth... and Jim caught some and began to eat it! I was horrified. Then, an out-of-breath Nick Frost rounded the corner; he had obviously given up on trying to catch the elephant. "Ooo, popcorn! Yummy!"

I knelt there completely disgusted as the pair of them huddled on the floor and ate my popcorn spew. Then an ambulance came, proceeded to pour butter over the popcorn mound I had just regurgitated, (to the men's utter delight) and then took me away on a stretcher.

That was my dream last night; something was definitely repeating.