Feb 6, 2011

California Dreaming

There are so many songs that make me think of important moments in my life, but two songs that hold a special place in my heart for pretty much identical reasons.

I've gone to California, Los Angeles more specifically, twice in my life and now ache to move there. When I went there the first time, I found myself lost in the beaches, the attitude, and the culture that was so desperately lacking in Wisconsin. I went with a now ex-boyfriend for a wedding and fell more in love that year. Only not with the boy I was with, but instead with a city that filled me with more energy and life than I've ever thought possible.

The second time was with a different guy, just to take a vacation. I remembered it all, but still felt like a kid in a candy store. The sights, the sounds, the smells - they all made me fall in love with the city all over again. Only this time, I fell even more in love with the boy I was with. On our first day in Santa Monica, the first day we had arrived in California, he proposed. We're now engaged to get married in Jamaica in April.

There's only one radio station I listened to there during each trip. I can't remember it for the life of me, but each visit was the same. There was a song I hadn't heard back in my hometown that seemed to be on every half hour. Luckily for me, they were songs that I liked and came to love and memorize before I left the state each time.

The first song was by Death Cab For Cutie. The song, I Will Posses Your Heart, seemed to have an intro longer than the song itself. While I'm sure it was written about another person, it echoed through my head as a calling for the the state, the city, and the beauty I would be leaving behind upon returning home. By the end of the trip, a part of my heart was left in the city, waiting for me to return to put it back together again.

When I returned, I felt whole again. I felt like I had found home. The second song spoke much less to me though, but left me with very fond memories. The song Kids by MGMT, played while we walked on the pier and while we walked through shopping districts. It played on a road trip down to San Diego and up the Pacific Coast Highway. And it played as we drove back to the airport, my head against the window, my heart separating again.

It's been over a year now and whenever one of those songs come on, if even for a moment, I feel whole again.

By Ashley @ After Nine to Five


  1. Damn! this post made me realize that I haven't been anywhere lol I've been stuck in texas my whole life (except for a trip to Chicago for a funeral). I so need to get out more! lol

  2. Oh, I love travelling! It's the best. This post is how I feel about AUS. *sigh*

  3. :-) I love how certain songs can evoke feelings and memories just like a scent. I have several songs that bring up wonderful memories and of course there are songs that remind me of a certain ex boyfriend who poisons my iTunes' playlist. Never share a favorite band with someone you might eventually break up with because the music will be tainted forever!

  4. I feel the same way about the Rocky Mountains. I just feel at peace there. I wish I had never moved away.

  5. I have friends and family in Cali, but haven't gotten out there to see yet...I think if I had a bucket list going there would be on it. As wonderful as it makes you feel I'd be scared to move there for fear that in time it would become less special. Does that make sense? LOL Congrats on the engagement, I hope you have a fantastic life with this gentleman when it is right, it is totally worth every minute <3 *hugs L.E.*

  6. My Dad lived in Cali while I was growing up..so I visited there a lot...somehow I'm still here in the corn fed midwest...lol.

    Love your proposal story though...very romantic!

  7. I have lots of songs that instantly take me back to certain moments in my life, too! I love it anytime I hear them...so perfect!

    Great blog...new follower! :-)

  8. Just blogging around and found your blog. Abosolutely music is what memories are made of. Music can remind you so so many things. You have done a great job with your page. Thanks for letting me visit.

  9. That song gets me, too, but for totally different reasons. It's amazing the things music (and a place) can do to you!


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