For the last few months, a Canadian national retailer has been dying a slow and seemingly painful death. The strange thing is that I've never even liked Zellers – their products and customer service sorely lacked in quality compared to their American competitors. I wish is wasn't the truth but that has been my experience.
FINALLY, it's the end of days for Zellers. Every week, the savings increase by 10% and the scavengers come flocking. Of course, I had to check it out every week – especially since I have twins, so buying everything in duplicate sure helps when it's 50-80% OFF. We got 2 new tricycles for $30 each. Score!
(I don't know this kid, but he was more than eager to pose for me.)
Then, I did something that I might not be overly proud of – I went to another Zellers and then another, and another to check out their spoils of a defeated retail war. My grandmother's obsessive shopping gene kicked in, which is my only line of defense at this time. I journeyed to one particularly close to The Big Smoke where the population is a lot more dense (in volume, not intelligence maybe), and this is what I found:
Which perhaps isn't too bad for those of you non-OCD people, but then I turned around and saw this:
Fuck that, yo!
People scrounging through merchandise on the floor. Throwing it, stepping on it, kicking items aside, treating it like it was a free-for-all! If this is what the Apocalypse (Zombie or otherwise) would look like, I just hope I go out quickly, because I have no patience for this fucking chaos. Not one bit. I love a good bargain as much as the next person, but if the shelves are in disarray and there's no civilized shopping to be had, please just put me out of my misery, because this made my heart hurt:
And without further adieu. . .
Dear gods of Target,
Please hurry up and give this store a baptism of fire
before you even think of moving in; just take my word for it.
Looking forward to being inside you!
Thanks.
Sincerely,
Lady E
Without further adieu??
AAAARGH @&*^#@E@NB#E@&#TU^EG@!*&T^E#G !@#GE!#E&!G@# E&!GY#E !&GYE# !&@GE#!#)(*@&#)(*~@^# ~@)(#E*~&@#K)E!~M@~~!!!!!