Hohum: A poem

Hohum my chum,
Hohum my chum,

Please keep away from my bum.

I do not like it, Hohum my chum.

I do not like it up my bum.

Would you like it here or there?

I would not like it here or there.

I would not like it anywhere.

I do not like it up my bum.

I do not like it, Hohum my chum.

Would you like it with my thumb?

Would you like it with some rum?

I would not like it with your thumb.

I would not like it with some rum.

I do not like it here or there.

I do not like it anywhere.

I do not like it up my bum.

I do not like it, Hohum my chum.

Would you do it with some lube?

Would you like it if I squeezed your boob?

I would not do it with some lube,

And what the fuck does squeezing my boob

have anything to do with wanting to put your dick up my ass?

Anyways...

I would not like it with your thumb.

I would not like it with some rum.

I do not like it here or there.

I do not like it anywhere.

I do not like it up my bum.

I do not like it, Hohum my chum.

Say! In the dark?

Here in the dark!

Would you, could you, in the dark?

I would not, could not, in the dark.

If you could not, would not 

let me try that route,

Then could you, would you, up MY shute?

I would promise not to toot.

I would not do that up your shute.

And, oh my fucking god, the fact that you bring up tooting

is the exact reason it's so repulsive.

A queef? Sure. But a toot? Heinous!

Anyways...

Not that route. Not up your shute.

Not in the dark.

Don't leave your mark.

Not with your thumb. Not with some rum.

I will not do it here or there.

I will not do it ANYWHERE!

I do not like it up my bum.

I do not like it, Hohum my chum.

You do not like it. So you say.

Try it on me! TRY ME!

And you may.

Strap it on and you may, I say.

Hohum!

If you will let me be, I will try it.

You will see...

SAY!

I like it up your bum!

I do! I like it, Hohum my chum!

And I would fuck you here and there.

And I would fuck you anywhere…

And we could do it in the dark.

And with some lube. 

What the hell? Go ahead and squeeze my boob.
I do so like it up your bum!

Thank you!

Thank you, Hohum my chum.

For showing me it's good, so good, you see!

But still...

You ain't ever fucking doing that to me.

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Thanks to Brandon (Lost in Idaho) for nominating me for Dudettes: The X-factor. Yay! Smooches ;)