Mar 15, 2013

America Saves Poor Little Veronica Mars!

It's truly a heartwarming thing when a nation rallies together to rapidly raise $1 million dollars for a movie about a girl who's . . .

dying of cancer

orphaned from tragedy

impoverished but had a cute YouTube video

ooohhh, that's right . . . Veronica Mars is a fictional character from a mildly amusing TV show played by Kristen Bell . . . who could have easily either self-funded the movie or had no problem finding Hollywood funding with those oddly inset eyes and that million dollar smile of hers.

It's so refreshing to see a "fundraiser" as important as the making of a Hollywood movie go so extremely well, and so quickly when it's endorsed by celebrities. I am amazed, for real. Especially when small, "faceless" organizations all over the world are screaming for donations for, ohh, I don't know . . . let's say arts education, abused woman & children's safe houses, foster programs, Cancer & HIV research and treatments, disaster relief, etc, etc.

It's awesome to see that America has its priorities straight.

Congratulations on reaching $1 million of every day people's dollars to create a movie that will earn you at least 50 times that amount. Then, those same donors will pay you a second time when they then go see the movie in theatre. I assume you have every single donor's contact details so you can repay them, and at least double their contribution as a token of your gratitude . . .
because you'll totally be doing that, RIGHT?


  1. I read $3 million was raised but I digress....

    Someone actually tried to convince me that this was FANTASTIC because:

    A) It's good to see America's entertainment dollars at work!!
    B) If this is all it takes to get a movie made with a strong female lead, right on!
    C) It IS helping the economy by providing jobs to cameramen, keygrips and the like who are desperately out of work and need to provide for their families.

    When I suggested that Hollywood makes more than enough money to fund this project themselves, I was told only the 1% have money, the rest do not. So I suggested that 1% could fund the project with pocket change.

    Ah, but the 1% saw it as took be of a risk, not enough guarantee of ROI, so they passed.

    And that's where America wins! The people have spoken with their almighty dollar!


    HIP!! HIP!!!

  2. Personally, I think its awesome. Until I think about it. It's really awful isn't it?

  3. @Rebecca

    I'm going to keep thinking it's "only" $1 million to contain my rage, so Shhhhh!

    And yeah, like this 1 ultimately "B" movie is going to be the savior of all Hollywood jobs? Whatthefuckever. Spare me. It's dumb.

  4. Exactly. They're patting themselves on the back for bypassing "the system". Terrific. Well done, you. Now use that forum for something worthwhile. I heard that in order to entice donations, they offered walk on and speaking roles to certain levels of donations along with the "honor" of having one of the stars record a voice mail message or a follow on Twitter. Oh, how that will change lives...


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