During the course of a short-lived relationship with some idiot guy (that begun with a version of scenario #2), I had come to know his housemates very well. The one had a girlfriend and we had hit it off right away, which helped since we both spent a lot of time at that house.
“I know. I know. He thinks that you will give all that up for him – I’m not sure which delusion he is living in. I think he is going to tell you tomorrow, so at least I am giving you some advance warning. I couldn’t even imagine what you would do if he told you without me breaking the news ahead of time.” No shit! I honestly didn’t know either and was thankful that she told me.
That night quickly came and after a couple rounds of joints, we all were going to go out for some food. Jeff puffed his chest out a bit, held me back and proclaimed to everyone, “You guys go ahead! Rachel and I have some important things to discuss.” O god... is he serious? My friend looked at me with pity-filled eyes as they left without me.
He sat me down on the couch and sat in a chair across from me that was much too short for his long legs; I was stoned off my rocker and was trying to keep a straight face with every ounce of self-control that I had left.
He looked me straight into my blood-shot eyes and told me that he loved me, very truly and very deeply. He said he was willing to look past all my ‘poor choices’ if I would agree to be with him and change my ways from that point onward. Apparently, if I loved him as much as he thought I did, I would easily change for him and we would abstain until our wedding night. YIKES! I was pretty freaked out with the intensity and resolve he had in his plans, all the way to having thought about our wedding. We weren’t even together and I felt like it was going to be one the hardest ‘break-ups’ that I would ever have to initiate.
Maybe I needed to experience that to see how awkward it was for the other person receiving the news, although I am sure I was only about 10% crazy when I performed my various declarations; Jeff was off the charts, 100% and beyond. Even if I had imagined wedding dresses with some of my past crushes, I NEVER would have told them, not ever! JESUS! Some craziness must be kept in your head!
I gave him the standard version of the “friendship” speech that I had come to know all too well, although I didn’t even believe that load of crap. After he revealed his extreme thoughts to me, I wanted to keep my distance from him for a while. Luckily, I was pretty much done with his housemate as well, so it worked out for the best to make a clean break with the guys in that house.