French Fry High

I remember that lunch hour like it was yesterday; it was grade 9. We were standing in the "smoking area", a bunch of us gathered around chatting, smoking cigarettes... the usual stuff and someone pulled out a joint. I had smoked pot before, but it never did anything to me– until this time.

When the joint was being passed around, I of course took a few tokes. After the joint was smoked, a buddy of mine and I went to the cafeteria to get some food. I was at the end of the line and was waiting for the others in front of me to get their food. By the time I got to put my order into one of the "Beaver Ladies" (that's what we called them in high school, I think it was because they worked for a company called Beaver Foods)... Anyway, I was finally at the front of the line; time seemed to go by very slowly. "French fries, please." The Beaver Lady scooped up the fries and handed them to me, almost in perfect slow motion, yet slightly out of focus. I paid for them and made my way over to the condiment table.

My friend was waiting for me and when I brought the fries over my mouth had turned quite dry. “Uh oh,” I thought to myself. I think I'm high! We decided to sit down in the cafeteria to munch on the fries while suddenly my vision and hearing became fantastically distorted. I was getting tunnel vision and all the voices in the cafeteria started to intensify and blend into each other- like I was inside a giant, fucked up human beehive. I was starting to get a little freaked out, so my buddy and I decided to take a walk around the school and try and walk off some of the weed.

After a lengthy walk, the bell rang and it was time to head to classes. I had an exam on Romeo & Juliet that afternoon. I thought about skipping it, but decided that it was too risky and might get caught having smoked marijuana, so I reluctantly went to the exam. (Like attending the class stinking of pot was the better way NOT to get caught? Yeah, ok, so logic does not exist when you’re stoned.) At the time, I thought I actually did alright...turned out I ended up getting 8% on that exam. I did manage to pass the course at the end of the year, but I'll never forget that day.