I wouldn't consider myself a "professional photographer" by any stretch, but I have dabbled and I taught both digital and traditional darkroom photography when I was a high school teacher. *shudders* So, I guess it's why some forms of photography get my titties in a twist slightly more than the average person... perhaps. I wrote a while back about my angry thoughts on "Trash the Dress" bridal photography. Ugh. Even finding that post in order to link to it got me angry all over again.
I'll blame the hormones this time.
Recently, I discovered some hilarious pregnancy photos that I just had to share. It was actually my husband that had mentioned that we should probably have at least a couple shots of me "with child" this time around, since we had quite a few of me with the twins. I think I took those photos more because I felt like a freak show, if for no other reason. I was H-U-G-E.
I realize that some of it stems from not liking myself in photos, but also maybe I'm just not that sentimental. The thought of paying for studio shots of my pregnancy actually makes me giggle and slightly sprain my retinas from too much eye rolling -- as did the idea of "engagement photos". I mean, really? No thanks.
Here is the one that initially sparked my utter dismay as far as pregnancy photos go. Could you see this hanging over that family's couch? In their dining room? BEDROOM?
|"I'm still not 100% convinced that this isn't actually Sacha Baron Cohen."|
|"Let's just assume this one's gonna be a C-section, mmm-k?"|
|"I want to expose my baby to Salmonella and Psittacosis as early as possible!|
Please shit on me while I meditate."
|"Because Mother Earth needs under-wire support too..."|
|"I love the feeling of all these balls around me!"|
|"Your daddy had a good head on his shoulders UNTIL I RIPPED IT OFF."|
|"Whatever's inside there is about to ruin everything for me, isn't it?"|
Yes. Yes it is.
|"You have your mother's hands. No really, that's all you got. |
They're floating around you in nothingness."
|"I'm gonna sit here and eat all the food. I don't give a fuck."|
|"LICK IT UP, BABY. LICK. IT. UP."|